Sunday, February 3, 2008

SHOOP DA-WHOOP! It's teh plot twist!

A team of chao... lost in a DEADLY city... and the only help they have? ...HELP? You kiddin'? WHAT help?

Dark Chao Adventures 08. Freaky. Deadly. Funny. Laugh. Scream. Terror. Teppop. CHAO.

Episode 08-Four: Reaching the Ice Temple

[the story continues with the chao exploring a colorful maze]
Chapter 1: The Mysterious Wall of Bricks
Hero: Man, all these colors are giving me a headache....
He: Tell me about it. What where these guys thinking when they built this place?
K: Yeah, I know... I mean, you can't take one step without collapsing from the colorfulness!
[Knuckle steps forward, and falls through the floor]
[the others follow, and find a floating patch of grass, and Dark-Hawk]
DH: Guys? How'd you get here? I mean... you fell out of thin air!
Shade: Yeah, and YOU'RE usually the one pulling the magic tricks. Where are we?
DH: I dunno. I've been stuck here for at least seven hours. I'm hungry!
Dark: Dang. How do you go so long without growing bored?
DH: Well, Phantom and Chaosky were here earlier. Phantom accidentally walked off the edge, and Chaosky dived in after him.
Shade: Didn't they respawn?
DH: Oddly, no.
Dark: That means they're not dead! There must be something down there!
DH: *gasp* I'm coming, guys!
[Dark-Hawk dives off the edge; a THUD is heard; minutes later, he returns]
DH: ...remind me never to do that again.
K: Remind ME to do that to Dark RIGHT NOW!
[Knuckle grabs Dark and tosses him off the edge; Dark sticks to the wall and finds a ledge; he climbs up and finds another patch of grass]
Dark: Nice try, Knuckle! I think I found how they survived!
[the others jump down]
PF: I say, the blokes who built this establishment certainly had much time on said hands.
Speedy: Quite so.
Tail: Indeed.
SShade: ...what's with the accents?
PF: I dunno.
[in the middle of the platform is a hole leading down to water]
Dark: Knuckle! Quick, I hear someone down there!
K: WHAT!? I'm coming, poor chao!
[Knuckle dives in]
Dark: Heh heh heh.... wait.... I DO hear someone down there!
[Dark dives in after him, followed by everyone else]
[out of the water, Dark looks around]
Dark: Um... guys? You may wanna see this.
[they walk out of the water, and gasp as they see a large wall]
Telepathy: Welcome to the big wall of bricks! One of these bricks is a secret trigger!
Hero: But... but there have got to be at least a hundred! We can't find ONE brick from here!
Shade: We don't have to. The exit's right over there.
[while they leave, S.Bonic and Dark check out the other side, and find a secret passage leading to a lone button]
Both: You press it.
Dark: I'm not touching that thing.
SB: Well, you're gonna have to; I'm not gonna.
Dark: *sigh* Fine...
[he presses the button; it disappears]
Telepathy: Dylan Hunt dancehall activated!
[their surroundings become a disco-like place]
Dark: ...okay.
[they leave, and find the Tour Guide]
TG: What are you two doing here!?
Dark: Uh... looking for dance halls?
TG: secret dancehall.... you two are going down. You hear me? Right down to the ground! C'mere!
SB: Dark, what do we do?
Dark: Uh... uh.... CHEESE IT!
[they split up and manage to escape the Tour Guide and find the others at a ledge]
SB: Guys? But, uh... I mean, what are you doing?
Chao: We've reached this ledge, and we've found these platforms that all lead up.
[Dark looks back and sees the Tour Guide's shadow]
Dark: Uh... uh.... well, just jump to each platform!
Chao: It's not that easy.
Chapter 2: The Four Stone Tablets
Dark: Whaddya talking about? GO!
[Dark throws Knuckle to the first platform, but a large, red thing drops down and crushes him]
Dark: *gasp* Was that the Nomble?
PF: No, it was just a red screen. It drops down every few seconds.
SB: ....*snap* Dark, quickly, come with me. Follow my lead!
[S.Bonic leads Dark back to the dancehall, carefully dodging the Tour Guide]
SB: Up there! There's a vent! I think I see something in it.
Dark: Okay, I've got an idea of how to open it.
[later, the Tour Guide comes in, holding a knife]
Dark: *throwing his voice* Help! I'm stuck in this vent!
TG: Heh... I have you now! *tosses knife at vent*
[the vent breaks, and a block falls onto his head, knocking him out]
Both: *cheer*
Dark: I think I know what to do with this.
[they take the block back to the ledge, push it off, and the red screen gets caught on it and stops moving]
[they jump up and find another maze]
He: *sigh* So many mazes... and NONE of them are that hard.
[at the end of the maze is a teleporter which leads them on a path, after the path is ANOTHER maze, this time vertical]
PFI: At least this one's original.
[at the end of the maze, they find Aqua]
Chao: Aqua? What are you doing here?
Aqua: You know the answer. Anyway, I saw this big, shadowy guy carrying four chao! He went down that hole!
[Dark and S.Bonic quickly jump down the hole, and find the Tour Guide]
TG: Well, well, well... where are your friends?
Dark: They're back up there.
TG: I see. Well, I have taken four chao... uh... *pulls out small piece of paper* .....Phantom....Chaosky.... Honey.... and.... Quart!
SB: You... mean Quartz?
TG: Right. Anyway, I have placed them in these four chambers. Also in the chambers are four stone tablets: Fire, Water, Wind, and Earth!
Dark: Your powers combined, this guy is Captain Planet.
TG: Shut up. Once all four are gathered, this door behind me will open. ...after I close it.
[the Tour Guide steps through the door, and it closes; the others come down; S.Bonic and Dark explain the situation]
Shade: Okay, four of us'll have to go look for the tablets, and another four for the lost chao.
Dark: I call wind!
Hero: I wanna go to the Water place!
SShade: Give me Fire.
Aqua: Earth is mine.
K: I'm looking for the Earth chao.
PF: Give me potato salad-- I mean, the fire chao.
SB: What the heck, I'll check the Water place.
DH: I'll help in Wind!
[they go]
[in Wind-- Dark and Dark-Hawk must traverse a thin cliff, all while powerful gusts attempt to blow them off the path!]
DH: This'll be a cinch. IRON BOOTS, ACTIVATE! *....nothing* I'll take care of this, Dark.
Dark: Uh.... Hawk? You don't have--
DH: A chance at falling? Thanks!
[Dark-Hawk steps forward, and falls off; later...]
DH: That was my idea, where's yours?
Dark: Well, if we run while sticking to the right, we may have a chance.
[they do that, and survive]
Dark: Hey, Chaosky.
Chy: Get me outta here. NOW.
[one long run later, they make it]
Dark: !!! We forgot the tablet!
DH: Nope. I got it.
Dark: Phew...
Chapter 3: The Ice Temple
[in Water-- Hero and Shadow Bonic must go deep-sea diving in the darkest depths of an underwater labyrinth!]
Hero: (thinking) Great. Swimming. Why'd I agree to this? ...hey, what's that? ...the tablet! *grabs and scrams*
SB: (thinking) Hmm... hey, why is Hero swimming the other way? ....... HE HAS THE TABLET! Come back!
Qz: (thinking) Hey, someone's coming for me! ...why's he stopping? ...why is he going the other way? I'll follow him.
[Hero and Shadow Bonic resurface, just as the entrance closes]
QZ: *bangs on closed entrance* HEY! HEY! REMEMBER ME?
SB: Oh yeah... well, Hero grabbed the tablet before I found you.
Hero: Don't blame me! I was simply doing my mission.
[Quartz decides to commit suicide by drowning, and finds his way back]
[in Fire-- She-Shade and Purflee are very close to the tablet, but must cross through LAVA to get to it!]
SShade: So hot in here...
PF: C'mon, we need to overcome the heat and find--
[Phantom runs out, holding the tablet]
PF: ....the chao and the tablet.
[they run out]
[in Earth-- Aqua and Knuckle must go spelunking inside a giant, incredibly dark maze!]
K: Great. Another maze. Hot damn.
Aqua: *slaps Knuckle* Don't even REMOTELY swear. You call yourself a hero? C'mon, Honey's somewhere in this dark maze!
K: *groan* But can't YOU find her? I'm too tired.
Aqua: Okay. If you say so.
[seconds later, Aqua runs out carrying the tablet and with Honey following-- the door seals as he exits]
K: HEY! LET ME OUT! ....*groans* *suicide*
[the door opens, revealing a black-and-white corridor, followed by a large park]
Dark: Hey.... I've seen this park before.... it was when I did some exploration of the bus station! But, something's different.
[they find a large sign with a question mark on it, next to some grenades]
Shade: Wait.... where'd all the others come from? Like YOU, Tail. I thought you had a bomb shelter!
Tail: Uh... we got bored, so we.... followed you? I mean, we don't know.
[Dark grabs a grenade, and throws it to a random spot, which blows a hole in the floor]
[in the hole is some sort of hallway, leading to the unknown]
Dark: Um... Knuckle, YOU go first.
K: ....*punches Dark* Fine, you *****.
[he enters, and doesn't come back]
[the others go in to check on him, and scream as they see his frozen body]
[their surroundings: a small, ice-cold cave]
MS: Stop! Get away from me!
Honey: Is that... Metal?
[they check outside the cave and see Metal Sonic cowering in fear]
Shade: Metal?
[Metal screams]
Dark: Wow. NOTHING scares YOU, and NOW look at you!
MS: Th-th-that tour guide guy.... he.... showed me the scariest thing imaginable.
SShade: What? What could be so scary that even YOU are scared of it?
MS: *inaudible whisper*
PF: Speak up!
MS: *whispering* Red..... Metal....
Dark: Isn't that the final boss in Knuckles Chaotix?
MS: Red....... Metal.... *scream* HELP ME!
SShade: Relax, Metal. Come with us, and everything'll be all right.
MS: Are you.... sure?
SShade: Yes. Come on!
[they get him off the ground and out of his fetal position]
[they stand there for a minute]
Honey: Um... where do we go from here?
MS: The tour guide guy said.... he said there was no way out of here.
Dark: No way out, except.... Metal, gimme your knife.
MS: What knife? Who said I had a knife?
Dark: ....Metal.
MS: Okay.... *gives him knife*
Dark: Thank you. *chops Metal's head off*
[everyone commits suicide, they wake up back at the Deluxe Office]
Chapter 4: Secret Shell HQ
Chao: So, where do we go from here?
Dark: I don't know...
SB: There must be a place that we haven't explored yet.... I remember learning of a Shell HQ hidden somewhere in this building.
[Shade and Chao look at each other]
Shade: Um... we found a Shell sign. We didn't explore it because.... we were scared.
[Knuckle slaps Shade]
Shade: How could I WHAT? And I thought you were frozen!
K: TO DEATH! There's something called 'respawn,' you know!
Shade: Well, why are you yelling?
K: I DON'T KNOW! I'm angry 'cause I died, I guess!
Dark: But you die all the time!
K: So!? That's probably WHY!
SShade: Guys, GUYS! You're not making any sense! *sigh* Shade, Chao, where was this Shell sign?
[Shade and Chao lead them to the room with the large Shell sign]
Tail: Looking at that thing is freaking me out.... I'm going back to my bomb shelter! *flees*
SB: Hmm...
MS: Lemme have a look at it. {Scanning.... Scan complete!} The sign is made of shell-o-nite.
Dark: So how do we break it?
MS: With this special substance called "die-no-mite." It's found in grenades, and old TV shows.
Hero: Well, you heard the robot; let's get searching.
[He finds a spot in the wall on the second floor, breaks it, and finds a secret hole]
He: Hm? Grenades! ...but now I'm trapped. ...only one thing to do when you're trapped, and have grenades...
[cut to Tail, relaxing in his bomb shelter]
Tail: Ah... this is the life.... nohing can get me in here....
[the wall near him blows up; He slowly walks out, stares at Tail, who stares back; He quietly walks away]
[back at the Shell sign]
He: Got 'em. *tosses one at sign* HIT THE DIRT!
[the sign blows up, revealing a secret button]
Shade: Um... uh.... hey, Dark, can you get that? I'm on the phone.
Dark: Sure. *about to press button, stops* ....wait a minute....
Shade: Just press it.
Dark: Fine. *presses it*
[the desk retreats into the ground; everyone hops onto it; it stops at a door, which opens]
[inside is a dark, red corridor; it's really rusty]
[the Darks push the Heroes in, and the 'elevator' goes back up]
Hero: But-- D'OH!
[they begin exploring the rusty corridor, wondering what happened to it]
[around the corner, they find a sign that reads "Shell HQ"]
Chao: *gulp* This is it, guys. Hey, where's Tail?
[cut to Tail in his bomb shelter, boarding up the wall that was blown open; back to the others]
Hero: Ah, who cares?
[they find someone asleep in a bed]
All: ....
Speedy: (whispering) Let's not bother him.
PF: (whispering) Good idea.
[the person wakes up-- it's Luis!]
PF: Luis? Luis Sumatuma?
LGS: That's Luis GREEN Sumatuma to YOU!
PF: Hey, bud! How'd you survive the Nomble?
LGS: I don't know... there was this odd, red substance seeping into the room..... the Nomble saw it and ran.
Chao: Red substance?
LGS: Yeah. It must be deadly. I mean, NOTHING scares the Nomble!
[the last line echoes through Hero's head]
Hero: ....Red Metal....
Chao: What?
Hero:'s nothing. Just had a wild thought.
Chao: Well, get your head back to Chao Talk! We've gotta get outta here, remember? ....but how?
[they turn around and see a door leading back to the office]
Chao: ...oh.
[back with the others]
[Luis tells everyone his story; Metal freezes]
MS: substance?
LGS: Yeah.
MS: The Nomble's scared of it?
LGS: Yeah.
MS: ....oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh CRAP!
All: What?
MS: That red substance is Red Metal! The stuff I told you about!
Dark: Uh-oh. So, if the Nomble is scared of this odd substance, it MUST be dangerous! ...*gasp* It gets worse...
Dark: Well, if Purflee said he lost Luis to the Nomble here, and Luis says the Nomble saw the substance, that must mean the Red Metal is somewhere in this building!
He: Well, we're screwed.

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